As I was in the process tweeking things on the blog, I came across a post I wrote around this time last year. Six weeks from my goal race last year and I was freaking out just a bit. What shocked me though was that I could have written this same exact post this year as well.
The premise is this: I am rocking my training. I have a string of awesome runs were I feel like a rockstar and then BAM! - it's 6 weeks before my goal race and running sucks. The same exact thing is happening to me this year.
In the past few weeks I have had some pretty stellar runs:
A 12 miler in Boston that was a full minute/mile faster than I had planned and I felt amazing the entire time.
Plus it was in Boston, my 2nd favorite city ever!
I've had some pretty good 14 milers and a personal distance record 16 miler with my favorite run buddy too.
I am not concerned about making the distance - I've been recording some of my highest mileage weeks recently and it feels really good. I do, however, have major doubts I will be able to hit my goal times. I just haven't been coming near my target paces during my training runs. While initially I was inclined to freak the F out about that, I am coming to the point of acceptance. I am not giving up my goal of a shiny new PR and will continue to work as hard as I can in the next few weeks. Ultimately this is not my job. I do this for fun and nobody but me cares if I PR this race or not.
I mean ideally I would love to see progress from previous race times. To me it is validation of all of my hard work. But the truth of the matter is that the mere fact I am making it through this training cycle is a small miracle.
First, I started off the training cycle injured.
Luckily, after several weeks of not running, I was able to regain my fitness pretty quickly and jump right into the thick of it. My foot still aches after my longer runs, but I am learning to take care of it.
And now, as I type this at 10pm my husband is leaving to go back to work. The poor guy has been working 16-20hr days for months. I've been left to handle the house, the children and my own full time job practically on my own. And each of these things is more important than numbers on a clock.
What I am trying to say is that no matter what the clock says in Philly, I need to be ok with that. I need to have fun and be proud of myself for even making it to the start line.